There have been rumblings about Hercules and Love Affair [Official Site, MySpace] being the greatest thing since sliced bread. New York Magazine raved about it, calling it one of the ‘top five’ albums of the year. Pitchfork gushed. Indie bloggers everywhere have fallen head over heels. I personally don’t see what all the fuss is about. I’ve listened to the album about a hundred times now, trying to love it and what it’s doing for the great world of music, but try as I might, I cannot induce Stockholm Syndrome. Apologies.

Sure, it’s groundbreaking in the way that it enhances and updates the best of seventies disco, much like “fit n’ flare” jeans are the new, better bell bottoms. I can appreciate that. But let’s talk about one of the most crucial aspects for an album to be successful: likability. Yeah, I said it. Now pick your jaw up off of your desk and just hear me out. For this album to be successful in its correlation with such a distinctive genre as disco, it needs to be extremely likable, and likable to the majority. Unless of course they are trying to reach a very specific indie-disco loving target audience, in which case mission accomplished.

There are reasons that the Bee Gees “Stayin’ Alive” is still played at proms and weddings, in supermarkets and elevators – people fucking love it. If you’re 7 or 70 chances are you’ve gotten down to it, in one of the above-mentioned venues. In two words: catchy, timeless. Hercules has not created an album that encapsulates these two qualities, which is why I’m not going to make rash predictions of Studio 54′s revival. It’s just not that memorable. The album’s sole addiction is “Hercules Theme Song” with its accompanying horn loops and layers.

Though it isn’t necessarily likeable, it is danceable. It will be a nice kind of retro at clubs. The beats won’t own you, but it will be a breath of fresh air in a nightlife dominated by Timbaland. What Hercules needs is to land on an iPod advert and become the opiate of the masses; however, they have about as much of a chance at that as finding Wonka’s golden ticket.

“Blind” [mp3]

Last 5 posts by Holly L. Perry

• Make Love, Not War - The (Subjective) Bedroom Mixtape - January 18th, 2010
• Yo Gabba Gabba - Music Is Awesome Review - December 9th, 2009
• Go Stuff Yourself - The Thanksgiving Mixtape - November 26th, 2009
• Noah and the Whale - The First Days of Spring Review - November 6th, 2009
• Volcano Choir - Unmap Review - October 15th, 2009